The other day I was scrolling down my Facebook timeline and I came across a post that somewhat irritated me to the point that I kept on reading it. It frustrated me so much that I took it a step further and had a discussion about the post with my daughter.
The post was addressed to Millennials, who according to Live Science, are those born between the years of 1980 and 1990. I thought my daughter was the appropriate person to discuss the post with being that she is a millennial herself.
I don’t want to bring attention to the entire post, just the section that rubbed my spirit the wrong way and left a subtle, yet stinging impression on the table of my heart. Like the kind that happens when I send my husband to the store to get me some Haagen-Daaz ice cream that I’ve been wanting all week and he comes back with the Walmart brand and expects me to enjoy it just the same.
My soul is on fire, but because he made the effort of trying to meet my requests, I give him a pass and do my best to enjoy the ice cream he brought me. Yea, it’s a sting like that. I know he should know better than bringing me something other than what I like, but because I love him. I accept his mistake and move on. That’s just how the post left me thinking, “you can miss me with that.”
The post started out……”Millennials” and then began to address some of the concerns the writer felt all millennials were dealing with and then went on to bring up dating issues such as the statement that sent me in a tizzy.
It read, and I quote, “There’s no such thing as “Godly Dating.” It’s just dating. How you conduct yourself while dating is on you. Everybody doesn’t have to potentially be your wife/husband just cause you saved.” Now, why did this post seem to put a dagger in my heart and leave me breathless and in need of resuscitation?
Let me break it down to you. “There’s no such thing as Godly Dating.” This is absolutely the truth. There is no scripture that addresses how a person should “date” but the Bible is filled with examples of how one should live and that living should carry over into every relationship you have; including dating because that person could potentially end up being the person you marry.
While researching for this post, I ran across a cute article that sheds light on scriptures for dating as a Godly woman and you can read it here: Another Approach to Dating
The post went on to say “how you conduct yourself while dating is on you. Everybody doesn’t have to potentially be your wife/husband just cause you saved.” Ding. Ding. Ding went the bell in my head and once again, that’s absolutely true.
Let’s take a look at the example I gave you about ice cream earlier. Now, I likes me some Haagen-Daaz ice cream and any flavor will not satisfy my appetite; only their chocolate flavored ice cream will please me.
However, if someone gifted me any of their flavors, I would sit back and eat it but yet, I would be longing for the chocolate flavored ice cream I’ve grown to favor.
Let me tie this in to how many women date in today’s society. She’s dating and has grown tired of waiting but she wants a man that works, like she does; she wants a man that knows how to budget money, like she does; she wants a man that shows her effort like she shows him; that’s what she’s come to love, but then, she meets a man that is barely working, doesn’t have anything in his name, but because he shows her some attention she’s willing to settle for his flavored ice cream all the while longing for the real deal.
The writer of the post is absolutely true when they said, everybody doesn’t have the potential to be your spouse. See, when you as a woman truly know who you are, you will know what you want and stay committed until you get it, but the problem is, most women know what they want, but have no idea what they really need.
When you truly understand who you are as a woman, your style of dating will be different and you will no longer accept any ole flavored ice cream because you know the flavor you like is worth waiting on and you’re willing to let the others melt until the real deal comes along.
If you’re dating someone and you’ve said “I love him but” then read this article and find out if you’re settling, 5 Sure Signs You’re Settling
Remember, God’s word says, “There is a path before each person that seems right, but it ends in death” Proverbs 14:12
Don’t date your way, live God’s way and then apply His way of living to how you date!
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Dr. Patricia Shaw, Chaplin & Certified Professional Coach
Teaching women who struggle to move forward in life and love how to go from burnedout and overwhelmed to living a liberated life. Overflowing with confidence, beaming with clarity, grounded in a commitment to who they are.